It's amazing to me to look back on November 22, 2010 and remember how it started out so normal. How it was full of laughter and smiling and normalcy. I remember my last morning with Gabe and I'm so glad it was full of laughter and smiling. I'm glad that there was no bitterness, anger, or unmended fences between us. I'm so happy that the last text message I sent him was telling him how proud I was of him and that I loved him. I love seeing his reply back that he loved me too.
There's much I have not written about the kids that we love and are raising. I have not told Gabe's story. I know some day I will. I know that his story should be told. If his story can help other children and adult children that are being abused then it would be his wish for it to be told, but today is not the day for me to write about his story.
I am so happy that the last 8 months of his life were the most happy months of his entire life. I am so glad I can look back and see how much he had healed from the abusive life he had lived for 21 years. I will remember the day he asked Tim and myself to adopt him and to choose a new name for him always. September 15, 2010...the day his adoption was finalized....how proud he was to finally be known as Gabriel Lofgren Jeffries and to shed more of his hurtful past. Each day watching him grow and change. To see him growing closer to the Lord each day. To know he had made some amazing friends who loved him for who he was and didn't look at his differences. To see the peace that was on his face the final months of his life were priceless. I loved seeing him so involved in church, work, friendships, and helping others. His heart was so precious. His love of others was so evident. He was such an example of selflessness. For all he came through in his life...he never put himself before others. He was just an amazing young man. He lived each day to the fullest as God intends us to.
I realize now how precious every second is with those you love. Even though I have moments of every day where I ache to see Gabe's laughing eyes and hear his joyful laugh....I know that he is in perfect peace and rest with our loving Father. I cannot be selfish in my own wants when I know that he is whole, not in pain, perfect in every way and I rejoice! I miss him so much, but I know I will see him again!
Sunday, December 19, 2010
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